Harvard Business Review reported in an article titled “How to Recession Proof Your Job” that when push comes to shove (if layoffs are coming), it’s more important for you to be ‘lovable’ than to be competent.
Why? It’s just that important to people that you are easy to work with.
So what makes a person ‘lovable’?
Good question, here’ s the most important thing to remember: You like people who are like you.
So, if someone perceives that you are like them, then they’re likely to like you.
Example: Your boss is blunt, to the point, and ends the conversation quickly. What are you going to do? You got it, same thing. Say what needs to be said and no more.
Another example: Your co-worker enjoys getting to know people on a more personal level. The solution? Spend just a few moments (not all day, of course) chit chatting about their plans for the weekend. To end the conversation, just say, “Well, I gotta get back to it. Talk with you later.”
Great news if you’re looking to be an even better version of yourself. Others have traveled the path of self-actualizing and optimal living, and you can too.
Let’s look at five ways that you can ramp up your personal growth game.
- Make the right actions habitual.
Michael Phelps, with eight gold medals the most decorated Olympian in history, is my personal favorite example for this first tip.
In his book No Limits: The Will to Succeed, Phelps talks about Coach Bob Bowman’s philosophy: set high goals, and work conscientiously every day to achieve them.
For five years, from 1998 to 2003, Phelps trained every day, except three days, one when there was a snowstorm, two others when he had his wisdom teeth pulled.
Other than that, he trained every day.
Phelps notes that all Olympians are obviously elite athletes, so what separates the great from the very best? (more…)
If you are on a path to become a better version of yourself, you’ve already discovered that not everything you try will work.
Whether you’re looking to take your fitness, business or spiritual enlightenment or other areas of your life to a new level, you’ll reach obstacles with you don’t always handle with grace and ease.
What can you do to ensure that you stay on your path of high performance, growth and self-actualizing even as you encounter these “slings and arrows of outrageous fortune”?
Use these five proven ways to overcome and you will prevail.
- Keep perspective. Recall the fact that you have overcome setbacks before, and you will prevail over this one, too.
The only way to change yourself is to challenge yourself.
This isn’t the first time you’ve attempted something new. You’ve been down this road before. Learning to drive is an example. Remember how awkward that was at first?
As you grow, of course, your challenges will get harder, yes? It will help to remind yourself, (more…)
Flow is the sweet spot
Flow is a state of mind and activity where your skills are just about at the level of the meaningful challenge you’re working on.
Mihaly c, psychologist, and author of the book “Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience” notes that while you can be happy from external circumstances, like a vacation or a raise, flow is “what makes for excellence in life.”
What keeps you from the optimal experience of flow?
If your skills are way above your challenge, you’ll feel bored.
If your skills are way below your challenge, you’ll feel anxious.
What to do with boredom?
What can you do if you’re feeling bored? Of course, we all have mundane activities we have to do, in both our personal and professional lives. Try making it a game. How can you make that process faster or more efficient? (more…)
We’ve been asking the wrong question.
We’ve been asking: “How long does it take to get good at something?”
Do you want to become a world-class athlete? A renown musician? A wildly successful entrepreneur? Th burning question has been: “How much time will it take?”
The idea that it takes 10,000 hours to become great, a concept popularized by Malcolm Gladwell’s best selling book Outliers, has been hotly debated.
Let’s shift focus and ask a better question.
Rather than: “How long will it take to get good?” Short answer: “Probably longer than you’d like it to.”
Let’s ask: “How do I make sure I stay on the path of mastery?”
Ask: “How do I stay on the path of mastery?” Rather than “How long before I get good?”
Mastery takes how long it takes.
A more empowering question might be: (more…)
So I’ve been getting back into fruit and veg, having really missed them during a brief stint of low carb madness. And then, I got a disappointing orange and started copping an attitude.
Here’s what happened, and what I learned from it.
I set aside 4 of the biggest pink grapefruits you’ve ever seen and two oranges for this week.
Really looked forward to eating that orange as part of my lunch the other day. Peeled it, and frowny face goes here: It was dry.
A dry orange is a sad orange. I tossed the whole thing.
Then, I started to think about it some more. Not the orange itself, mind you, my life is a bit more exciting than that. I started to think about how if you let them, tiny inconveniences can really
mess up your day.