Perhaps the man or woman you voted for for US President did not win. Perhaps he did.
I believe it’s fitting today to remind you, with love and respect how much your true character shows when you win or lose something.
Are you being gracious?
Think about it.
Wins and losses are your opportunity to reflect the very best of your personal values.
What values are you projecting right now?
Bet you’re better at building relationships than you give yourself credit for.
The key is to recognize in yourself the behaviors that people find naturally attractive and to be willing to build these likable qualities, and bring them out more often.
How many of these qualities do you have, and which could you cultivate even more?
1. You (wisely) mirror and match. To the extent that it makes sense, you mirror the other person’s body language and match her vocal quality.
This is important for two reasons. Reason #1: We like people we perceive to be like us, and when you mirror and match others, they feel you’re a kindred spirit.
Whether at your business, or in your personal time, the quality of your relationships influence the quality of your life.
Here are three quick tips for personal development drawn from emotional intelligence that will enhance your connections with others and add more happiness to all of your relationships.
- Give a genuine “Hey, it’s you!” smile when you see someone. Easy to get deep into concentration at work and have, what looks like a scowl cross your face when someone approaches your workspace.
While fake “I’m always smiling really big, even when I’m alone,” looks aren’t necessary, you can have your body language radiate warmth just by thinking “Hey, it’s you!”
Think of the look you might have if you went out to lunch and saw a friend unexpectedly at the café. That’s the look!
Just a note: You’re not always going to be able to take the time to listen each time someone wants to talk to you. What to do so you’re not seen as an aloof grouch? (more…)
Do you struggle with having tons to do, yet quickly losing focus? Feel you are always busy, but that you could be more productive without working so hard?
I can relate!
I found something that’s helping me with this. It’s a book called “Time Warrior” written by Steve Chandler. No time to read? I get ya. Here’s the YouTube link, so perhaps you can listen to the audiobook while you go for a walk, or do some errands.
(NOTE: Now on YouTube: Don’t Rerail Your Career! These Actions Will Get You Back on Track https://www.youtube.com/edit?o=U&video_id=zxJznIUddm0
Wanted to share three ideas that will help you get crystal clear focus:
- “In a simple life in which you only do what’s in front of you, there can be no overwhelm, ever.” Try this: make a space on your desk for the one task you’re tackling. I found it works when I tell myself: “Just this. Just this.”
- “Don’t hold your happiness hostage to the achievement of a long-term goal.” Wow, wish I’d heard that when I was younger! This is an important reminder to not only revel in the small successes, but to find joy in the journey itself.
- “What needs to be done in these three minutes?” This question encourages great laser-guided focus! What helps you get focused?
Are you easy to work with? If you have high EQ, or emotional intelligence, the answer is absolutely, and no doubt your co-workers appreciate this about you.
Since likeability is key to a positive, productive and profitable workplace, it’s important for all who work with others, either in an office or virtually, to take a self-awareness check from time to time to make sure none of these EQ mistakes are slipping through.
Check in now to make sure that these problems are not an issue for you.
- TMI. Giving “too much information” is especially tempting when you’re going through a particularly difficult time. It’s a relief to release some of that tension by telling people at work what’s going on and to get some sympathetic validation.So, what’s the problem with that?
SPECIAL Note:Want to hear and see more about self-awareness and EQ, Emotional Intelligence? You’re invited to watch the longer YouTube video on a webinar I gave recently. The topic is: “Manage Your Moods: 5 Simple Steps to Emotional Intelligence”Here’s the link to that: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAcLSOGdzEk
Meanwhile, back to our article: It’s always harder to listen to someone else’s hard time than to talk about your own. When you’re knee deep in drama, you might feel as though you’re just sharing, but most other people, unless they are your very best friends, will feel like you’re dumping on them.Remember that it takes emotional energy to lift someone up when they’re going through a rough spell. And once they spend that energy on you, they don’t have it for other people or themselves.
When you’ve worked hard, beyond what anyone has the right to expect, and yet you’re still not getting the success you want, you can feel helpless.
After all, when you’ve given your effort all you’ve got, what else is left?
You CAN turn this around. Just when you feel at the end of your rope, there is a clear path of what to try instead. It just takes a mindset shift on your part.
Your answer in turning what seems like an impossible situation into a successful outcome comes from the words of Sir Winston Churchill: “Sometimes it is not enough to do our best, we must do what is required.”
I remember the first time I read that quotation. It was on a bumper sticker on the car in front of me in back to back traffic.
It was Los Angeles, it was rush hour, and I’m pretty sure a few we were going about negative five miles an hour.
The bumper sticker read: “Sometimes it’s not enough to do your best, you must do what is necessary.”
I immediately chose to feel annoyed. (Notice that I say “I CHOSE” to feel annoyed. At least I was taking ownership of my feelings.)
My automatic response was “What do you mean, my best is not enough? What else is there?” (more…)